01/15/2020 – Hipsters and Jailbait

After deciding I’ve prowled around Mayfair too much, I decided to hit up Bayshore Mall before UWM gets back in session a week from now. It was surprisingly active for a cold winter day. Granted, I’ve been told it’s been a light winter for Milwaukee much to my delight.

Approach #1: When I first parked at Bayshore, I hit up Kohls and ran into a cute, hipster girl. I’d rate her a hard 6, inching onto a soft 7. I decided to do an opinion opener after grabbing this red-over-black plaid shirt and asking, “Excuse me, I need a girl’s opinion, but do you think this looks good on me?” She smiled, said it did and matched my outfit.

I knew I had to play to win, but I rationalized I wasn’t “in state” yet, and to be honest, played to not lose. We had a nice, friendly chat. Turns out, she’s there for a wedding in Chicago. I teased her a bit on her backpack, and said it looked hipsterish. As she chuckled, I said “That was the most adorable look you made,” before we went back into our conversation. A little later on, she started asking me personal questions, but I didn’t escalate.

At the end of our conversation, she ejected out of set.

Approach #2: Damn, this was a GREAT set, but lo and behold, met a girl who was in high school (again). Anyway, I went into the Barnes and Noble and ran into a blonde girl intently focusing on her studies. She reminded me of, well, me when I was in college. A good little student who didn’t say much and studied like a mofo.

She was a hard 7, very cute, bubbly, and had a naive vibe to her. I knew this should’ve been the first signs she was underage. In any other case, I opened with, “School’s still going on?” It was a lame opener, but whatever. She looked up and replied, “Yeah.”

The second she looked up, I saw how adorable she looked and my game skills shot through the roof. I started doing cocky funny lines, lots of push-pull, and she ate that shit up. She laughed aloud, leaned into me, but further into the conversation, I asked what college classes she was taking.

Her response?

“Oh I’m in high school.”

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuuuuuuuck.

I smiled, talked to her a little more, and left the set with great sadness.

Approach #3: Needless to say, despite the fact the girl was underage, I was finally “in state” – very positive, happy-to-lucky and all that jazz. However, I didn’t find another good set for another hour or so and I was winding down. The next girl I met looked cute from a distance: She was smoking a cigarette, texting on her phone, and I opened with, “You look like you’re in your own little world right now.”

She looked up and smiled. As I saw her, I noticed she wasn’t very cute. A soft 5. Since I wasn’t very enthusiastic about the conversation, I didn’t make it very man-to-woman and I think I said a premise line here or there.

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