On 11/07/21, Sunday, I ventured off to Downtown Chicago with Chris after a looooong night game session on Saturday. I literally woke up at 3PM, before getting ready to hit the streets. However, when I was on the train, I decided to pop on James Marshall and The Natural Lifestyles podcast instead of my usual Eckhart Tolle. I’m so glad I did. James spoke of what he calls “practical meditation”, and how to utilize awareness in all situations in life.
There were a few key principles I learned:
- Non-attachment: Stressors come into my life. Whether it be from a hot girl, a shaky train, to a mere itch. The idea isn’t to let it affect you. It is what it is. Objectively understand what it is and leave it at that. Most guys react to shit. If a girl rejects them -> they feel terrible -> let it affect them the entire night/day.
- Getting Out of Your Head Via Adjusting Your Focus: Lots of guys try getting out of their head by logically analyzing what happened or simply telling themselves to get out of their head. As Todd V states, this is the worst thing to do, since ironically, telling yourself to get out of your head puts you into your head!
This has two steps (+1 extra):
a.) A direction of concentration and focus: For example, if you pinch your fingers, you redirect your attention from your head -> your slightly painful fingertip. Now my focus is somewhere else. I have to direct my concentration to somewhere else instead of my monkey mind thoughts which jump from branch to branch, from thought to thought to do whatever it wants.
However, that alone isn’t meditation.
b.) Remain balanced, objective, and non-reactive: I’m observing something, yet allowing it to be as it is. For example, when I’m meditating let’s see a loud noise startles me, or I’ve got a pain in my lower back, if I go out to rub my back or check out the noise, those are reactions starting to happen. I need to sit there and feel the pain or let the noise run it’s course without curiously checking it out.
Instead, just put your mind deep into the sensation or into the noise and sit there. Don’t give an opinion (ie. “Oh, this is irritating, what is it?”, “I want to get rid of it.”). Just observe it as pure sensation. It’s not good. It’s not bad. It just is.
c.) Women Are Not The Enemy: Okay, I lied, this one wasn’t on the TNL podcast, but something I realized while day gaming. For me, pickup has always been an adventure. It’s like you’re playing a custom character on an MMORPG. You gain experience, passive abilities, active abilities via how much work you put in. Thing is though, women are seen as an opponent you “level” yourself up with.
This is going to sound strange – and probably won’t resonate with most of you – but once I switched gears and saw women as individuals who, too, want to meet a cool, sexy guy to fall for or to be loved, I started getting much better results.
Women are people, too. Not an enemy or adversary to overcome.
Once I did my exercises with James Marshall, I felt unusually aware, like everything was radiant. I was walking up the steps, thinking about my next course of action. Namely, find Chris. That’s all that was in my head. It was singular, focused. I didn’t think about pickup, nor the happenings around me. Just the fact I needed to find my wing.
After we met up, I told my brain, “What are you doing right this very second? You’re approaching girls.” Gears switched.
Which leads into the field report itself…
Approach #1 – The Czech Bartender
Synopsis: Literally less than a minute, I adjusted my focus to pickup, and I ran into this hard HB 7, 30 y/o, Czech bartender who tends to a high class bar/club in River North. I opened her with, “Excuse me, you have the most elegant, sexiest outfit I’ve seen all day.” Basic as hell, but my delivery was fucking mint. She felt my presence radiating through her, as I projected sexual intent hard.
In 30 seconds, I began leading her forward.
This was totally subconscious. It felt like a whirlwind of old skills started flooding back to me right at that very moment.
My next objective shifted to one word: Instadate.
As fate had it, we were coming across this extra boujie Starbucks with a rooftop bar. Once I spotted it a block away, I asked if she was a fun, spontaneous girl. She immediately nodded and it was incredibly simple leading her into the Starbucks.
Dude, I wish I had this all recorded, but everything came out so fucking smooth. Like, my push-pulls, qualifiers, leading, everything was on point. I gave off this sexual, fuckboy vibe and she ate it right off my hand. At this point, approximately an hour in, she did 90% of the talking, and I responded in a calibrated, yet high value manner.
We ordered our drinks (I, a Manhattan and she, an Espresso Martini), as I kept running game subconsciously. However, if I had to point exactly where I fucked up in set, it’s this part: At the latter half in set, I gave off a strong fuckboy vibe, in which my target responded: “I’m not looking for anything romantic.” God, I took her at face-value. Like, I didn’t see it then, but after pinging Chris and u/fastlife15, they were like: “Bro, she just wants dick. This is a shit test. Just tell her you’re not BF material. It’s easy to pass.”
Fuuuuuuck.
I’m not beating myself up, but this didn’t register at all when I was with my girl. Still, I did extraordinarily good, and I’m proud of myself for running nearly flawless game.
At the end of the set, I took her number and bounced to find Chris.
She’s texting me back hella fuckin fast.
What I Did Right:
– Fucking Everything: I ran flawless game. Push-pulls, qualifiers, projecting sexual intent, establishing a Man-to-Woman premise, everything was on point. Like, no hiccups. It’s like everything I knew months prior just came flooding back to me in this set. IMPORTANT: All because I was truly present in the moment after priming myself with practical awareness meditation with James Marshall.
Sticking Points:
– Not Passing The Romantic Shit Test: Like I said – I ain’t beatin’ myself up for failing to pick up on the shit test, but it’s an invaluable learning lesson I won’t fail next time. If she throws that line at me, just say, “Ya that’s cool, I’m not exactly boyfriend material.”
– Didn’t Bring A Fucking Recorder!: While failing to notice the romantic shit test is my first mistake, my second was not bringing an audio recorder. Tbh, I woke up at 3PM on Sunday and I honestly thought I was going to grind it out again in Downtown Chicago. Boy, was I fuckin’ wrong.
What I’ll Do Next Time:
– Do Present Moment Awareness W/ James Marshall On Train (aka Practical Meditation): Eckhart Tolle opened my mind to the concept of mindfulness and present moment awareness, but James Marshall showed me the true power of now.
I won’t listen to music, audiobooks, or “practice” being present in the moment by looking aimlessly out the Red Line without thinking.
I will teach myself how to adjust my concentration and focus, while remaining balanced, objective, and non-reactive.
Comments: As you know, presence is the foundation of great game.